An Illegal Street Race Named Desire (EN)
by Laurent DS
Summary: In the land of Mordor where the speed rises


**An Illegal Street Race Named Desire**

In the arid lands of Mordor, in the Machine tribe sector, the rain poured down continuously since the start of the 4th Age. No more was the reign of Sauron, the Era is now of fuel and adrenaline. The wet arid soil was reflecting the neon lights of the industrial quarter of Gorgoroth. As midnight approached, the thugs and businessmen gathered themselves near the road. We could hear the sounds of bottles being smashed, threats, laughs and … the sound of an engine. It roared like a Caragor. The heads turned toward the origin of the sound: it was Brûz on his famous Harley-Davidson chopper. The crowd went silent. Brûz was renowned for his wild temper and because he never lost a race. People could even see him on Pop Tarts commercials (the orc equivalent of Lembas bread). The race was beginning soon and the contestants approached.

Among the pilots, the crowd could recognized Brûz's cousins: Baz, Daz and Gaz (the inventor of fuel). They were always present in the races of Gorgoroth, hoping to dethrone their undefeated cousin. There were also the champions of the other regions: Shelob, the spider matron of Cirith Ungol riding her 8-wheeled Monster Truck; Baranor, the mysterious Gondorian, driving a numenorean machine; and Shaun White, the triple gold medalist of Seregost. Zog, the champion of the Tour of the Island of Nûrn, was absent due to a fatal accident during his last race. A few new challengers were also present: two sisters from the Far East and a mysterious hooded ranger. Brûz was not afraid of the ranger because his ride looked like trash.

The crowd was impatient, the motors were roaring, the hands of the racers tight on their steering gear. The drake spit his fire; the race had begun. Like always, Baz, Daz and Gaz had a strong start, going crazy fast. It was an amazing spectacle. Brûz's cousins never learned to control their emotions. The champion knew that it would not end well for them. Brûz also had other cousins (Ben, Ten and Zen) and thanks to them, he learned the most important virtue: patience. In fact, some of Shelob's little spiders were hiding behind some rocks and jumped in the cousins' cars. A few screams, an explosion, and a smile on Brûz's face. A few perfectly executed turns, and the sound of Mithril sliding on rock.

From the corner of his eye, Brûz saw Shaun White descend the coast of the volcano with mad speed. The medalist put on his goggles and surfed on a lava wave. His speed was that of lightning. Unfortunately for him, he tripped on a heavy chain; the Nazgûl Sisters were driving two electric tricycles linked by a cursed chain. The competition was fierce. All the remaining racers were constantly switching positions, except for the ranger that remained in last place. However, he was not far behind. Brûz, analyzing the state of the race, dodged an archer's tower at the last moment. This hitch slowed him more than he wanted, and Shelob took the opportunity. With her Spider Monster Truck, she passed through the tower, creating an explosion of wood chunks. She was now in first place, destroying everything in her path.

"Go Isildur," Brûz said. He named his bike in honor of his favorite Nazgûl. He slowed down a bit, focusing himself on the quality of his driving. He knew that if he executed the course with perfection, he could reach a speed that is both furious and fast, but it would take a legendary amount of patience and concentration. Thanks to this new tactic, Baranor passed by Brûz and took his place. The great champion of Gorgoroth was not impressed. Clearly, Baranor was driving a very advanced machine, but he seemed like he had no idea how to operate it. If all went well, Brûz would be the winner.

It was at this moment that the ranger's engine stalled. Brûz was smiling with his big Olog teeth: he was going to win. However, he didn't see the smile on the ranger's face because it was hidden in the shadows of his hood. The ranger took off his hood and said "just according to këkäkü (translator's note: këkäkü means _plan_ in elvish)". Anime music starts playing and a light blue explosion traveled Middle-Earth. The ugly wreck that ranger was piloting underwent a transformation: it became a speedbike of pure light and the ranger's identity was revealed under the moonlight. It was the _Gravewalker_ and he was back. Talion, the ranger, flew in the sky with his bike of pure light and won every illegal street races at once.

20 years later:

Talion, the great champion, was sitting with Celebrimbor his manager, and Isildur his trophy husband. The construction of his new racetrack was finished. Celebrimbor approached the champion and said: "The new Ring – our Ring – it is not marred by his shadow. It is perfect". He was referencing the One Ring of Sauron, the biggest racetrack in Mordor. Talion shook his head and put on his new edgy racing helmet. It was a given that he would win. He always win.

The challengers had all arrived at the starting line. Every racers knew that they would lose, but the exposure was great. Every racer except one. His name was Brûz, and he was here to retake what was taken from him: his champion title and Isildur.


End file.
